Everything you need to know about friendly Ufa

Wed, 20 May 2009 08:51:00 -0400

This article was published in the Vancouver Courier online edition. The article ) is not online anymore. enjoy.

There’s a form of travel planning where you consult brochures and travel agents about destinations, then pick the one that best meets your vacation requirements. This is how Thomas Cook and people who are concerned about your well-being want you to travel. There is, however, another form of travel planning in which you spin a globe, look for places with bizarre names, and select one that’s farthest away from where you live. Vancouverites who favour this method couldn’t do much better than Ufa, Russia. Not only is it 180 scintillating degrees of longitude away, it’s called, well, Ufa.

Ufa, as you undoubtedly don’t know, is a city of 1.1 million near the Ural mountains, and the capital of Bashkortostan, a republic within the Russian federation. Ivan the Terrible founded Ufa in the 16th century as a fort from which to fight off woolly-headed nomads. Stalin gave it a big boost when he moved most of Russia’s industry eastward from 1941 to 1942. Today, Ufa is a peaceful industrial city that rises undramatically from windswept steppes. Think of it as Edmonton without the Ukranians.

“Ooooh!” you say. “How do I get there?” Well, you can fly there via Moscow, but it’s more fun to fly to Moscow and take the train. A one-way second-class ticket to Ufa costs about $65 Cdn. For the price, you’ll get a bunk in a four-bunk compartment and all the stilted conversation you can handle during the 25-hour journey east. I took the popular “Bashkortostan” train (#40), which reached Ufa at around 8 p.m. A guy gave me a ride into town, but you can take tram 1 or 13 for a less-than-20-minute ride.

If you follow my lead, you’ll go to the Agidel hotel, located dead centre on Leninsky Street. You won’t get a room, of course, because there are no rooms available at the Agidel or any other hotel in Ufa. There is a massive shortage of hotel space. Moreover, all but one of the hotels (and I called them all) are staffed by Brezhnev’s embittered ex-mistresses who hate you and want you to leave. The exception is the pricey yet humane President Hotel. Book ahead, or better yet, arrange a homestay through a travel agent. I called a couple of people I vaguely knew there, and they graciously arranged to put me up.

Since there is no telling what will happen to you in Ufa, here are some answers to questions that would be frequently asked, if people frequently asked about visiting Ufa.

Won’t I be killed?

Once, when I told a co-worker I was going to Russia, he began telling me how to survive being kidnapped and tortured. His reaction was typical. All I can say is that I spent 10 days in Ufa, and a month in Russia, without a single incident. Only the traffic is scary. Just remember that vehicles have the right-of-way everywhere, including the sidewalk. Step lively.

Does Ufa have a tourist office?

Nope. Moscow doesn’t even have a tourist office. If you’re staying in a homestay or have other local connections, you may be able to track down a bilingual guide through the grapevine. Otherwise, you’re flying solo.

Where can I get money and food?

You can find both in Gostiniy Dvor, the long mall on Leninsky street. It sports a giant poster of Putin kibitzing with the President of Bashkortostan in a bar. Inside, you’ll find both a bank machine and a Western-style supermarket with good bread and sausage. Note the paramilitary security guard at the entrance, but resist the urge to salute him. For eating out, try one of the low-priced caf‚s on Leninsky street. If you can decipher the menu on the counter, you’ll be able to stuff your face with hearty fare for $5 or less. I recommend Chaihana, but bring your own napkins and don’t touch the curtains.

How do I get around?

Ufa’s plans for a metro collapsed with the Soviet Union. You can either take an overcrowded tram for 15 cents, or a more comfortable van for 25 cents. You can identify transit stops, as someone helpfully explained to me, by the fact that a lot of people are standing on the sidewalk, looking expectant. There’s supposedly a way to figure out where the trams and vans are going, but I don’t know what it is.

What are the people like?

The people in Ufa were the most hospitable I’ve met anywhere. Once you know one person, you’ll soon know dozens, and many will want to take you around, feed you, and generally beam admiringly at you. The few Westerners they encounter are often trying to entice them to join oddball American churches, so an authentically lazy and decadent Westerner is a welcome novelty. Be prepared at any moment to have your

palm read or a brick of cheese thrust in your hand, or to be invited to meet someone’s cousin from Magnitogorsk.

What is there to see and do?

Quite a bit, if you know what to look for. Here are some possibilities:

If you like theatre, you’ll be in luck. I watched a fairly lavish production of Aida at the Opera House on Leninsky street for about $1.50. The theatre itself is very Old World, with grand staircases and golden balustrades. On the main floor, you’ll find tributes to Rudolf Nuriyev, famed wearer of very tight tights and Ufa’s most famous son.

Ufa is also awash in art. You’ll see art displays in malls, stores, and on the sides of public buildings. Check out the Nesterov Museum on Gogol street. It’s named for local boy Mikhail Nesterov, whose spooky paintings of a young saint having a vision in the woods can also be found in Moscow’s Tretyakov gallery. Most of the paintings similarly blend mystic and natural themes, and will perhaps give you a little glimpse of the Russian soul.

Somewhere near the centre, you’ll find a folksy recreation of a 19th century Ufa street. Each building is a museum, and the staff not only let you touch the cool stuff, they actually insist upon it. They made me bang away at a century-old piano, and my guide got to manhandle a 200-year-old shawl. I would describe the lovely five-domed church that dates back almost to the founding of Ufa, except that the commies blew it up several decades ago.

Since the indigenous Bashkirs and Tatars are nominally Muslim, Ufa is a good place to go mosquing. The more striking mosque is in the suburb of Chernikovska. It was built recently by Turks and features two minarets in the shape of giant tulips. If you prefer your mosques with soul, however, check out the 100-year-old Ufa Mosque in the centre, which resembles a house. When I arrived on a Thursday night, a man was chanting prayers at the top of the stairs, and children were learning Arabic in a dimly lit corner.

The war memorial is well worth a visit. Located near the big mosque, it features a dramatic statue of a falling soldier. It also affords you a panoramic view of the countryside.

When I was there, a light snow was falling, and the wind coming off the plains made a low “shhhhhhh” sound as it passed through the trees. That sound remains my most enduring memory of Russia. If the mysticism and weird fatalism that I sensed everywhere in Russia could be expressed as a sound, it would be that long, indifferent, “shhhhhh.”

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Everything you need to know about friendly Ufa